the year twenty twenty eight
that's the year little Judah will be 18. how do i know? well...
last week opened with an upbeat mummy, happily considering dad's proposal to one day have another baby. she had been stalking jools oliver (wife to jamie oliver) on instagram. the sight of their 4 happy kids generally enjoying life together was definitely making mummy think this 3 kids thing might not be such a bad idea. by the end of monday, mummy was not quite as upbeat as she was at the beginning but remained optimistic as she took in a picture of the Oliver kids swimming in their pool looking healthy from eating all their home-grown food. she went to bed dreaming of her own mansion with pool plus garden patch to grow pumpkins et al.
tuesday and wednesday were meant to be her days of rest & me-time as i go to nursery. however as i'd decided that monday night & tuesday night would be my up-all-night-ers, mummy was in zombie mode & slowly the once brightly colourful picture of 3 kids was slightly fading. wednesday night mummy decided to plan how she'd entertain me on thursday and friday. upon looking at the weather forecast was shocked to find that not only was it going to be 29C on thursday, but that that was the last day of summer. she begged daddy to take us to the seaside, explaining that i was probably the only child who thought the beach was a place on the tv show peppa pig.
we went to the sea side, i built sandcastles, baby judah dipped his toes in the water, i swam in the sea with daddy. we even had a bbq on the beach! mummy says you haven't lived till you've tried sand-infused bbq sausages - i decided to pass. it was fun all round. mummy's dream of 3 kids was slowly being infused with colour again. thursday was a happy day.
friday however was not. as the temperature nose-dived to 18C, so did any chance my dad had of seeing that dream of 3 coming to pass. by the time i'd run rings around my mum, refused to nap in the afternoon, joined little judah in a who can scream louder contest and generally been a wind up all day, mum was checking out long term/permanent contraceptive solutions. before bed, she checked her instagram and saw the Oliver kids bouncing around looking happy & healthy as usual. well, nobody posts pictures of tantrums she said to herself & told her uterus to stop skipping. when would she be free again, she wondered. 2026, I'll be 18. and 2028 so will baby Judah. She was excited until she realised how old she would be. better start enjoying these moments mum! you wont be 30 forever! (fine....so mum isn't 30 any-more but i've got to get her back onside - i don't want to be sent to boarding school). she says she's not far off 30 so i'm not lying. she just coughed.